This crazy little thing called English……….

This post is not so much of a post really……….it’s more of a compilation of the some really hilarious spelling mistakes I come across (particularly, in rural India)……..

1. The most common wrongly spelt word: PUNCTURE. Some spellings I’ve come across – Penchar, Panchar, Punchar, Pinchar, Panchur…………..

2. Repair is another such word. The common spellings are – Repare, Ripare, Ripare, Ripayer……….

3. Chinese!!!!!!!! The small time restaurants (dhabas, if you may) that boast of making Chinese food often don’t spell it properly. Some spellings are – Chainies (I couldn’t get over this one for a long time), Chainees, Chineez………

4. Telephone (can you believe this!!!!!!!!!!!!) Common spellings are – Telifon, Telipoon (was written by a maid in IISc in a message to some student who missed a call. The message read: Telipoon col for you, man col, no name, col baik :D), Telliphone, Telephoon………..

5. Bike (now considering how many alphabets are there in this word, I was amazed at the number of ways in which this has been wrongly spelt). The spellings are – Byk (my sister pointed this out to me in a shop near Mandya), Byke, Baik, Baeek (took me a while to figure out and THANK HEAVENS for the photo of a bike on the hoarding or else, I could never have guessed!!!!), Baic (again, thankfully, the shop was open and I had to logically deduce what the word meant)……….

6. Coke (considering the number of ads available for Coke in EVERY SINGLE form, this sure came as a surprise). The spellings were – Coak, Cokk, Coake (this was in a cinema hall in DELHI city and evoked a generous laughter from me and my friends)………..

7. Beauty Parlour (yes, ladies and gentlemen, this is another very common wrongly spelt word). The spellings “I” have seen – Beauty parlar, Beauty Paarlor, Buty Parlar (this was in Indore, and I shall NEVER forget this one, no wastage of alphabets! :D), Byuti Parlour (this one probably knew the spelling only of parlour and this was in Aligarh, on my way to my village)……….

Well, this was from my side……………any additions?

PS: Chinese people are no less in grammatical and spelling errors! I shall soon be back with photos of some REALLY funny sign-boards from China (I hope my friend will be willing to lend those to me)……….



  1. Rajani said,

    November 12, 2007 at 3:45 pm

    Truly hilarious… I guess there could be a similar post on the way non-native speakers of English speak the language, where we could all laugh at ourselves…

  2. Geetika said,

    November 12, 2007 at 4:58 pm

    The one I found spelled child bear instead of chilled bear . i don,t know whether it was done purposely to draw attention or was really a mistake.

  3. Geetika said,

    November 12, 2007 at 5:00 pm

    sorry!!! I myself have spelled bear instead of beer :p

  4. Neha said,

    November 13, 2007 at 4:29 am

    Puncture: spelled as pumpchar 🙂

  5. Tata said,

    November 13, 2007 at 6:42 am

    “Spell Checker”

    Eye halve a spelling chequer
    It came with my pea sea
    It plainly marques four my revue
    Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.
    Eye strike a key and type a word
    And weight four it two say
    Weather eye am wrong oar write
    It shows me strait a weigh.
    As soon as a mist ache is maid
    It nose bee fore two long
    And eye can put the error rite
    Its rare lea ever wrong.
    Eye have run this poem threw it
    I am shore your pleased two no
    Its letter perfect awl the weigh
    My chequer tolled me sew.

    Munnabhai and Circuit strikes again!

    Circuit: Bhai america mein address puchega tho kya bolne ka
    Munna: Dhobhi Ghaat
    Circuit: Bhai english mein bolneka tho?
    Munna: Washington

    Circuit: Bhai idhar aane ko kya bolna
    Munna: Come Here
    Circuit: Bhai phir udhar jaaneko kya bolthe hai?
    Munna: Pehle udhar jaaneka phir bolneka come here.

    Circuit: Bhai yeh kaisa bolne ka – chale hat hawa aane de
    Munna: simple hain yaar – Hey u move sideways let the air force come

    Circuit: Bhai tum tho pass ho gela bhai
    Munna: Yes bro i have just passed away

    Munna: Abhi tu bol eh mamu bheja mat phira
    Circuit: Mother’s brother dont rotate my brain

    Munna: Ab yeh bol apun ko bahut sardi ho gayi hai
    Circuit: I got big winter in small nose.

  6. Tata said,

    November 13, 2007 at 6:49 am

    Why is 1 mushroom was a fungUS while many were fungI?
    “US” is many and “I” is single. –Little Kat

  7. Tata said,

    November 13, 2007 at 7:24 am

    Why are same letters in English pronounced differently?

    Examples: ‘U’ in Put and But
    “C” in Cease and Catch.

    One of my friends in the 1940s (Poor fellow, who was later a special corresponded for the Times Group and worked in Nairobi, Beirut, etc. but assed away early in life) used to say “English is a bastard language; Americans have prostituted it and we Indians are trying to rape the offspring”
    While in Singapore, he used to write to me regularly under the caption ”Straight from the Straits”!

    English had adopted (or adapted?) several thousands of words from other languages. For example
    1. mulligatawny soup
    [muhl-ih-guh-TAW-nee] The name derives from the Tamil, a people inhabiting southern India and the surrounding area, and means “pepper water.” This soup is based on a rich meat or vegetable broth highly seasoned with curry and other spices. It usually contains bits of chicken (sometimes other meats), and can also include rice, eggs, coconut shreds and even cream.
    2. Pundit

    Even the first edition of the Oxford English Dictionary contained a number of Hindi and Hindustani words. Many Hindi words have been so much anglicised that they look like original English words. For example, shampoo, juggernaut, chit, cot, puttee and bandanna are some such words. Shampoo has its origin in the Hindi word champi, which means head-massage with oil. Juggernaut is Lord Jagannath’s chariot symbolising an irresistible, unsurmountable and all-conquering force. Chit has evolved from the Hindi chitthi. Cot is nothing but khat in Hindi or charpoy, which is another English word meaning charpai in Hindi. Puttee is derived from the Hindi word patti meaning in English a cloth strip wound round the leg from the ankle to knee particularly by soldiers so that the legs are not tired during a long march. Bandanna or bandana is a large silk or cotton colourful handkerchief, evolved from the Hindi word bandhna. The exotic-sounding word dixie is Hindustani degchi, a large metallic cooking utensil. Gymkhana has developed from Hindustani gend-khana, which means a ball-house or a racquet court. Bungalow is from the word bangla and veranda (verandah) has developed from the Hindustani word baramada.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: